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13 things that make me happy

Former acquisitions editor Jennifer Pooley wrote a post on her blog entitled “13 things that make me happy.” Nothing on her list actually makes me happy (#1 comes the closest, but my creative process is slightly different), so I thought I’d write my own list. Narrowing it down to just 13 items was impossible, so…

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First marks

My son, Charlie, made his first marks on paper while waiting for our meals at a local restaurant. Perhaps this is just the beginning. Maybe he will be following in his father’s footsteps and writing novels someday. Wouldn’t that be nice. Also, it’s looking like you’re probably right handed. Nobody’s perfect.   

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Sperm, sticks and downright douchebaggery

TIME recently posted a piece entitled A Dozen Random Goods & Services Selling Unusually Well Right Now. A few were particularly notable to me. American SpermIn Canada, Australia, the United Kingdom, and many other countries, sperm donors are not allowed to be anonymous. U.S. donors are under no such obligation, which is why America has…

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Father-son discussion

I’m sure that we will have some serious and unpleasant discussions in the future, but the conversations that my son and I have today aren’t too bad, especially when only one of us speaks English and the other mostly shoves his hand into my mouth and bites my nose.

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“In The Night Kitchen” relies on the penis for its success and notoriety.

This reading of In the Night Kitchen got a lot of attention on the Internet last week with the passing of James Gandolfini. And Gandolfini delivers a spectacular reading of this Maurice Sendak classic, but let me go on the record as saying that I do not like this book at all. Perhaps it’s because…

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In the wake of the Supreme Court’s DOMA ruling, I can’t help but accentuate the negative

I think it says a lot about me that as happy as I am about the Supreme Court’s ruling striking down the Defense of Marriage Act, I take infinitely more pleasure in imagining how outraged, surprised, angry and defeated the bigots in this country must feel right now. I should feel elation for my gay…

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Second place sucks. I am a jerk.

I came in second place on Monday night at a Moth StorySLAM in New York City. I was in first place after four stories but gave up the lead to the eighth storyteller, who told an amusing and revealing story about her battle with herpes. Last week I finished second at a Moth StorySLAM in…

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If only he could remain so agreeable

My son has begun to make that transition from baby to little boy. He can speak a few words now, and he’s crawling upright on all fours rather than slithering around the house like a snake. He’s even stopped putting everything in his mouth for the most part. Most recently, he’s begun to pull himself…

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The Moth: Guys in Shower

The following is a story that I told at a Moth StorySLAM at The Bell House in Brooklyn in December of last year. The theme of the night was Courage. I told a story about being unexpectedly trapped in a shower in a woman’s dorm. I finished in third place that evening, defeated by my…

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Taking a stand against not taking a stand to avoid offending someone

Last week I posted a list of things that I had never done that caused me to feel pride. I receive quite a bit of pushback on this post. Specifically, readers felt that the list was an indictment of anyone engaging in these behaviors. I want to address this concern in two ways. First, I…

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