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The Japanese puffer fish has serious game

In ninth grade, I would buy ice cream from the school cafeteria for the girl who I liked in hopes of garnering her affection.

In tenth grade, I broke a water pipe, destroyed a portable eye wash, and placed cafeteria buns – complete with poetry and props – on the desk of a biology teacher who wore her hair in a bun in order to convince a girl that she and I were meant to be together.

When I was 22 years old, I tried to fight two guys simultaneously in a parking lot in College Park, Maryland, in order to impress a girl who I liked.

When I was 23 years-old, I drank an unprecedented amount of alcohol in hopes of getting a girl’s attention.

When I was 32 years-old, I asked a girl to brunch while she and I were both sitting in our cars at a stop light, hoping that a little daring might win the day.

You’ll be surprised to learn that none of these efforts yielded the desired results.

In the end, all I needed to do was meet the girl of my dreams, spend nearly two years teaching down the hall from her, slowly becoming her friend, waiting for her to be single, until one day, at long last, she liked me.
Liked liked me, I mean.
Playing the long game. My specialty. 
And knowing Elysha, destruction of property, tormenting teachers, massive amounts of alcohol, and fisticuffs would not have impressed her.
Though the ice cream might have worked.

But the Japanese puffer fish puts everything I did to shame. What it does to attract the attention of a female counterpart is nothing shirt of astounding.

The video is about two minutes long, but you’ll be thinking about it for days.