Resolution update: 2019 in review

Every month, I report on the progress of my yearly goals in an attempt to hold myself accountable. Here are the results for December and for 2019 as a whole.

I posted my New Year’s resolutions for 2020 yesterday.

In 2019, I completed 21 of 44 goals for a success rate of 48%. This is below my 10 year average of 55%.

My previous year success rates:

2010: 44%
2011: 62%
2012: 30%
2013: 60%
2014: 60%
2015: 59%
2016: 59%
2017: 71%
2018: 50%

Despite completing less than half of my goals, I had some areas of great success in 2019. I performed especially well in the areas of storytelling, completing 9 of 11 goals. I also completed 4 out of 5 in personal health.

While I’m pleased with the overall results, there were some missed opportunities. My biggest disappointments included my failure to lose 20 pounds, my failure to fund to write three new picture books, and my failure to complete any of my larger writing projects.

Those were all very doable in 2019.

There were also quite a few pathetic failures.

I failed to write a new screenplay for the third straight year. I failed to pull off our Heavy Metal Playhouse reunion after coming so close. I failed to play six games of poker. I failed to spend at least six days when my best friend of more than 30 years.

These were not difficult goals to achieve or at least get started.

2010 also provided to be an extraordinary year in many regards. I had several surprising accomplishments and firsts that did not make my initial list of resolutions but became important as the year progressed.

I’ll post that list in the coming days.

Here are my specific successes and failures from 2019:

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PERSONAL HEALTH

1. Don’t die.

I survived another year. Huzzah. And no major scares, either, unlike 1983 and 1988, when I required CPR to restore my life, and unlike last year, when chest pains sent me to the hospital fearing a heart attack only to learn that I had pulled a chest muscle by walking around New York City with an unevenly loaded backpack.

SUCCESS

2. Lose 20 pounds.

I nether lost not gained a pound in December.

I’ve lost a total of 7 pounds in 2019. A disappointing result.

FAIL

3. Eat at least three servings of fruits and/or vegetables per day, six days a week.

Done!

Lots of apples, potatoes, bananas, pineapples, onions, and grapes.

I tried arugula on pizza for the first time and didn’t hate it.

I tried some fried squash and didn’t hate it.

I should’ve eaten more peppers. I like peppers.

SUCCESS

4. Do at least 100 push-ups, 100 sit-ups, and 3 one-minute planks for five days a week.

Done.

Physical therapy for two shoulders and an elbow kept me from doing push-ups and planks for the last three months of the year, but beginning last week, I’m back on the exercise bandwagon.

SUCCESS

5. Do burpees three days a week.

Done. My physical therapist told me to stop the burpees three months ago when I was working on my shoulders and elbow, but prior to that, I was grudgingly doing this stupid exercise.

Never again.

SUCCESS

WRITING CAREER

6. Complete my seventh novel before the end of 2019.

Writing continues, and I recently figured out the piece that I was missing.

Huzzah!

That said, I’m just finishing chapter 1 of the book. Again.

FAIL

7. Write/complete at least five new picture books, including one with a female, non-white protagonist.

I have eight picture books in various stages, but I did not finished a single one in 2019.

FAIL

8. Write a memoir.

Work continues, but it’s nowhere near completion.

FAIL

9. Write a new screenplay.

No progress at all in 2019.

FAIL

10. Write a musical.

No progress at all in 2019.

FAIL

11. Submit at least five Op-Ed pieces to The New York Times for consideration.

I submitted a piece to the NY Times Modern Love column in April. It was not accepted. It was the only piece submitted in 2019.

FAIL

12. Submit one or more short stories to at least three publishing outlets.

No progress at all in 2019.

FAIL

13. Select two behaviors that I am opposed to and adopt them for one week, then write about my experiences on the blog.

I spent July strategically smiling in hopes that the biofeedback that a smile sends to the brain would alter my mood positively. I wrote about the results of that experiment in October.

This month I created a vision board for myself. I thought this would be a ridiculous exercise with no discernible benefit, but people seemed to think that the inspiration that a vision board provides is useful. I’ll write about my experience later in January.

SUCCESS

14. Increase my storytelling newsletter subscriber base to 3,000.

DONE! 131 new subscribers in November for a total of 1,054 new subscribers in 2019. My list now stands at 3,164 subscribers.

SUCCESS

15. Write at least six letters to my father.

No letters written in November. Two written in 2019.

FAIL

16. Write 100 letters in 2019.

Zero letters written in December. 28 letters in all written in 2019.

FAIL

17. Convert Greetings Little One into a book.

SUCCESS

STORYTELLING

18. Produce a total of 10 Speak Up storytelling events.

DONE! Two more shows produced in December:

A traditional Speak Up show at the Connecticut Historical Society and a show at Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health featuring myself and Kathy Binder.

A total of 17 shows produced in 2019.

SUCCESS

19. Begin selling Speak Up merchandise at our events and/or online.

DONE! We began selling tee shirts and totes at our live podcast recording, and we’ve been selling it ever since.

SUCCESS

20. Pitch myself to at least 5 upcoming TEDx events with the hopes of being accepted by one.

DONE! And what a strange turn of events!

After pitching myself to five TEDx conferences and getting nominated for a sixth with no luck, three TEDx organizers invited me to participate in their conferences in October.

I was invited to speak at both TEDx Trinity College and TEDx United World College in Changshu, China. Tragically, I had to turn these down due to scheduling conflicts. But I will be speaking at TEDx Berkshires in May of 2020.

SUCCESS

21. Attend at least 15 Moth events with the intention of telling a story.

DONE! I attended one Moth StorySLAM at Housing Works in NYC in December.

This brings my total to 22 events in 2019.

SUCCESS

22. Win at least three Moth StorySLAMs.

DONE! I won 8 Moth StorySLAMs in 2019.

Two in NYC, one in Seattle, and five in Boston.

45 victories in all.

SUCCESS

23. Win a Moth GrandSLAM.

I finished in second place by a tenth of a point in a Moth GrandSLAM in Boston in January.

I finished in fourth place in a Moth GrandSLAM in Boston in March, but I think I might’ve told my best story ever.

I competed but did not win the NYC Moth GrandSLAM in June. Silent scoring (WHICH IS STUPID) prevents me from knowing how I placed.

Zero victories in 2019.

FAIL

24. Produce at least 40 episodes of our new podcast Speak Up Storytelling.

DONE!

Four new episodes released in December. A total of 44 episodes in 2019.

SUCCESS

25. Perform standup at least four times in 2019.

One standup performance in December. Four total performances in 2019.

SUCCESS

26. Develop and teach a Storytelling Master Class, in which participants have an opportunity to tell at least two stories over the course of the day or tell a story and then retell it based on feedback.

DONE in June! It went surprisingly well, and I’ve scheduled another for 2020.

SUCCESS

27. Pitch at least three stories to This American Life.

No progress at all in 2019.

FAIL

28. Pitch myself to Marc Maron’s WTF podcast at least three times.

DONE!

I wrote to Marc early in January, asking for him to consider me as a guest.

I wrote again in August.

I wrote again in November.

No response yet.

I’ve also officially requested that my publicist assist me in this endeavor.

If you know Marc Maron, or know someone who knows Marc or know someone who knows Marc’s producer or booker, please let me know. I know that Marc and I would have an amazing conversation, and it’s currently my biggest dream to get on his show.

SUCCESS

NEW PROJECTS

29. Host a fundraiser for RIP Medical Debt, which would allow us to relieve the medical debt of struggling Americans for pennies on the dollar.

No progress at all in 2019. I’m disappointed with myself.

FAIL

30. Complete my Eagle Scout project.

No progress in 2019. I’m disappointed in myself again.

FAIL

31. Print, hang, and/or display at least 25 prints, photos, or portraits in our home.

Painters are scheduled to work during the first weekend in 2020, but we can’t hang anything until the walls are done.

Out of my control to a certain degree, but still…

FAIL

32. Renovate our first floor bathroom.

Work began last month and is about 60% complete. Again, out of my control to a certain degree, but…

FAIL

33. Organize our second floor bathroom.

SUCCESS

MISCELLANEOUS

34. Cook at least 12 good meals (averaging one per month) in 2019.

I made one meal for the family in December.

Nine meals in total in 2019.

FAIL

35. Plan a reunion of the Heavy Metal Playhouse.

I had a tentative date and a venue, but I could not get enough alumni to confirm, so it was postponed.

FAIL

36. Ride my bike with my kids at least 25 times in 2019.

I rode my bike with my kids for a total of 15 times in 2019.

FAIL

37. I will not comment, positively or negatively, about physical appearance of any person save my wife and children, in 2019 in an effort to reduce the focus on physical appearance in our culture overall.

In December, I wrote about people who wear makeup to the gym. My readers were enraged, supportive, informative, and in agreement, depending on who you asked. I wasn’t commenting on any single person but a group of people in general. Still, this violated the spirit of my rule.

That said, I slipped twice in 2019. Not bad at all. I’m giving myself credit for this one.

SUCCESS

38. Surprise Elysha at least six times in 2019.

DONE! Surprises included:

• I gave Elysha socks decorated to look like cats as an “end of conference week” gift.
• I mailed a card to Elysha’s school, telling her how I much I love her.
• I mailed a second card – much more clever – to Elysha’s school, telling her how I much I love her.
• I purchased a a Pusheen cross-stitch kit and gave it to her on a day she was giving surprises to the kids.
• I hired a landscaper to install a garden plot in our backyard, which she found when came home. She spent the summer growing vegetables for the first time.
• While vacationing at Disney World, I surprised Elysha by scheduling a second dessert party and VIP viewing for the Magic Kingdom fireworks. We had enjoyed this treat on our first night in Disney, but it was expensive. But the fireworks were also our favorite part of the entire trip, so I decided to surprise Elysha by repeating the experience on the last night of the trip, regardless of the expense.
• While meandering through Pike’s Place Market in Seattle, Elysha spotted a pair of earrings that she loved but thought were too expensive. When she wasn’t looking, I took a photo of the earrings and grabbed a business card from the designer. Then I emailed the designer and asked that the earrings in the attached photo be shipped to me. I had hoped to have the earrings on her desk for the first day of school, but they arrived two days late, so I gave them to her two days later. She was quite surprised to see them again.
• I surprised Elysha with a weekend getaway to Dorsett, Vermont.
• I skipped a Patriots game on Sunday when my friend and seat mate was too ill to go (and it was pouring rain), so I drove home from Kripalu instead of straight to the game. I determined her location and appeared in aisle 4 of Whole Foods around 1:30 PM rather than the 11:00 PM arrival that was expected.

SUCCESS

39. Replace the 12 ancient, energy-inefficient windows in our home with new windows that will keep the cold out and actually open in the warmer months.

I have a possible window installer and maybe even the money needed, but I failed to pull the trigger in 2019.

FAIL

40. Clean the basement.

Done! There is furniture and some other items that need to go, but they are organized and ready to depart.

The basement looks very good.

SUCCESS

41. Set a new personal best in golf.

I took lessons in 2019 and improved considerably, but not enough to set a new personal best.

FAIL

42. Play poker at least six times in 2019.

Four games played in 2019.

FAIL

43. Spend at least six days with my best friend of more than 25 years.

Four days spent together in 2019. A terrible number.

FAIL

44. Post my progress in terms of these resolutions on this blog on the first day of every month.

Done.

SUCCESS