My wife and children are ruining football for me.
I attended the Patriots game on Sunday. The weather was spectacular, the pregame tailgate menu was superb, and most important, the Patriots won. It was the first game in more…
Unfair assumption #6: If you have your own diamond guy, there is little chance that we could ever be friends.
A woman at a recent book event was complimented by another woman for the diamond necklace that she was wearing. She thanked the woman for the compliment, and her husband,…
Three reasons why helium balloons suck
First, there is a serious helium shortage in the world today, and helium is a crucial ingredient in MRI machines, wafer manufacturing, welding. Wasting this precious resource on party balloons…
Your North Face is a your coat, moron.
Could someone please explain to me how the brand name North Face has come to replace the word coat for some people? I hear adults and my students say things…
My toddler is a crack addict. Even worse, your Amber Alert system is still operating in 1997.
My wife and I took our daughter to a local grocery store on Saturday morning to register her for the Amber Alert program. In order to register a child for…
I chose not to become a professional cuddler
My list of careers is long. Elementary school teacher Author Wedding DJ Minister Professional speaker Life coach My list of careers that I am seeking to make happen include: Professional…
I’m in complete agreement with Johnny Rotten
"The only thing you have in life is life. I don’t care if both legs fall off and there’s only one eyeball left. I want life!" – John Lydon (Johnny…
The perfect apron for those who support vegetables by not eating them.
I’ve written my hope that one day we discover that plants are actually sentient beings capable of thought and feelings. I’ve cited research that indicates that plants can see and…
One percent of stupidity
As of today, this video has been viewed more than three million times. It’s been liked by more than 41,000 viewers. It contains not an ounce of political rhetoric. Not…
I’m honest about my stupidity simply because I’m stupid more often than most.
I spent a weekend in Santa Cruz recently while on book tour. I was taking part in a literary retreat in which I had the opportunity to speak both formally…
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