Since my hernia surgery, I’ve heard from some readers that the pain they experienced post-hernia-surgery was the worst they’d ever experienced.
I appreciate their expressions of empathy.
I’ll admit, the pain is not good. Not the worst ever, but certainly memorable. I thankfully turned a bit of a corner yesterday in terms of the suffering. I still can’t cough or even clear my throat without considerable pain, but I can sit fairly still and feel comfortable.
I can’t feel parts of my left leg, which is odd, slightly inexplicable, confusing to the doctors, and therefore disconcerting, but at least it’s not painful,
Sort of the opposite of pain, really. Numbness and an utter lack of sensation of any kind.
Hopefully it goes away soon.
But all of this led me to wonder what is the worst pain I’d ever experienced.
I went head first through a windshield when I was 17 years-old, for example, tearing open my knees to the bone, breaking ribs, and dislodging the entire bottom row of my teeth in the process, but shock immediately took over, removing most of the initial pain of the accident.
Wiring that chunk of teeth back into my jaw in the emergency room makes the list as one of the most painful things ever – quite high on the list, in fact – but the initial injuries from the accident were horrific but startlingly painless.
Awakening from my hernia surgery in the recovery room was admittedly very bad. It took the nurses about ten minutes to get my pain under control, so for a few minutes, I couldn’t believe how much it hurt. A nurse asked me to rate my pain on a scale of 1-10, and I answered with a 9 but only because I wanted to leave room for a 10 if things continued to get worse.
I honestly couldn’t imagine more pain.
I also sneezed one day after my surgery. Thankfully my family was across the street at a pre-Halloween birthday party, so they didn’t see me weep after the sneeze. The pain was indescribable. That sneeze, and the subsequent pain, definitely makes the list.
When I was in my late teens, hot oil from a McDonald’s fryer was accidentally poured on my hand, which resulted in incredible pain initially and ongoing pain for about 48 hours. I finished my shift at McDonald’s with my right hand in a bucket of ice water, and it took more than a day before I could tolerate the pain without any ice. I’ve got scars on my hand from the first few drops of oil that hit my skin.
That incident makes the list, too.
But the worst pain I’ve ever felt happened in the fall of 1996 while working at a McDonald’s restaurant in Hartford, Connecticut. I was closing the safe – a large, incredibly heavy door – and got distracted, resulting in my slamming of the safe door on my right thumb.
Nothing in my life has hurt as much as that pain. I screamed like I have never screamed before.
My friend and coworker, George, rushed me to the hospital, but I remember thinking along the way that if George could end my life right now, I might allow it. I ran into the emergency room, still screaming, clutching my hand, staring at a thumb that had grown three or four times its original size.
Without even speaking a word to me, a doctor approached with a scalpel, grabbed hold of my wrist, told me to freeze, and made a small incision down the center of my thumb, release blood and pressure and reducing the pain exponentially.
“Sweet relief” was precisely what I felt as blood oozed down my hand and wrist.
When it comes to the list of most painful experiences in my life, the slamming of a safe door on my thumb was worst. Nothing in my life has hurt as much.
That sneeze the other day came close, but it was fleeting compared with my thumb. Excruciating but short lived.
Hopefully everything moving forward pales in comparison.
