Stories = friends

I received an email at 9:15 AM on Sunday morning that read:

Since the pandemic began, I have shifted much of my business online, so messages like this have become oddly commonplace.

Sunday’s workshop included storytellers from France, Texas, Montreal, Illinois, Ontario, Iowa, and Connecticut.

I’m currently working regularly with clients in San Fransisco, Los Angeles, Toronto, Romania, Australia, and the UK.

Even before the pandemic, I had folks from far away coming to Connecticut to attend my workshops. My last summer boot camp, back in July of 2019, included storytellers from San Diego, Vancouver, Chicago, Atlanta, and China.

This, however, was the exception more than the rule.

But when you’re teaching online, nearly every workshop is international, and it’s pretty great. The pandemic has shrunk my physical world considerably, limiting the places that I visit and keeping more homebound than ever before, but at the same time, my global reach has oddly expanded, introducing me to so many new people. I have friends in countries all over the world now, and this newfound international exposure has expanded our podcast audience and made the audiences for our virtual shows much more diverse in terms of location.

And when I say friends, I mean that in the truest sense of the word. When you spend hours, days, and even weeks with with someone, working on their personal stories, marketing plans, book proposals, advertising campaigns, keynote speeches, sermons, and wedding toasts, you can get very close very fast.

It’s one of the unique powers of storytelling:

The forging of fast friendships. Deeply trusting relationships. Significant, enduring bonds with other human beings.

Telling personal stories, listening to personal stories, and engaging in conversation about those stories will quickly, almost inevitably intertwine two hearts.

I also have the added bonus that many of the people who I work with already know me well from my books, podcast, and stories, so that intertwining often begins before I even step into the picture.  It’s not uncommon for me to meet someone – online or in real life – who knows me intimately even though I still don’t know their name.

I did an interview on Saturday, and the first thing the interviewer said was, “I know it sounds weird, but I feel like I already know you and Elysha. I kind of feel like we’re already friends.”

But telling stories will bring you closer to people, and the more vulnerable you’re willing to be about the stories you tell, the closer you’ll become.

If you want a new friend, tell a story. Share something meaningful and real about yourself – hopefully in a slightly crafty and entertaining way – and you’ll quickly discover that the divide that exists between the two fo you will rapidly disappear.

In addition to the many people who I am proud to call my friends, I know of many other friendships that have been born in my workshops. Best friends have found each other while spending days telling stories with me. Whole groups of people have gone on to become constant companions in one another’s lives. I know of at least two romantic relationships what have begun in my workshops.

Sadly no marriage proposals yet, but when and if that happens, I’ll be ready to officiate and DJ the wedding if asked.

I am desperately looking forward to the day when I can take the stage in a crowded theater and tell a story or perform stand-up again, but even when that day finally comes, we will continue to produce virtual shows and workshops, too, to accommodate our far-flung friends and fans and remain in touch with these people all over the country and world who have come to mean so much to me.

If you’re looking for a way to find a friend, tell a story, listen to others tell their stories, and allow the magic to work for you, too.