Skip to content

My 2021 Christmas haul

Every Christmas, I take inventory of the holiday gifts that my wife, Elysha, gives me.

Some people wish for cashmere sweaters, the latest gadget, stylish watches, and jewelry. My hope is often for the least pretentious, most unexpected, most nostalgic, quirkiest little gift possible, and Elysha never fails to deliver.

When it comes to gift giving, Elysha is brilliant. More than the gifts themselves, her choices tell me that she knows me.

She sees me more clearly than any other person in my life.

For the past 12 years, I’ve been documenting that inventory of gifts that she has given me on Christmas because they are so damn good. Every year has been just as good as the last, if not better.

This year was pretty fantastic.

  • A portable 30 second Dance Party button, complete with German emcee
  • Three desktop games: tetherball, scoop & catch, and boxing
  • Golf balls (a new, upstart brand), tees, and a ball retriever
  • Chattering teeth
  • Slaughter House-Five, the graphic novel
  • Interesting Stories for Curious People
  • A box of Jesus-themed bandages
  • A Far Side calendar
  • Fart whistle
  • A new brand of shaving cream
  • A 5 in 1 keychain and a telescopic keychain
  • A paddle board, convertible to a kayak, complete with waterproof, bluetooth speaker and waterproof iPhone case

The paddle board and speaker will likely become my favorite gift once summer arrives,. but for now, the 30 second Dance Party is top of the list.

I hope you received gifts just as brilliant as these this holiday season.