A new survey found that 20 percent of American adults were responsible for 75 percent of the books read in 2024.
These are our greatest American heroes. As an author, reader, and patriot, I salute these cultural and intellectual warriors.
Breaking down that data:
38 percent of Americans said they read zero books in 2024.
These are likely our serial killers, bigots, con artists, humblebraggers, New York Jets fans, people who use speakerphone in public, and members of the Trump administration
28 percent said they read one to four books in 2024.
These are our underachievers. They aren’t terrible people, but they are likely spending too much time staring at small screens, playing meaningless video games, and scheduling useless meetings. They must toss aside their childish and foolish ways and make more time for books.
14 percent said they read five to nine books in 2024.
These are good, decent human beings who spend a reasonable portion of their days engaging in meaningful endeavors. These people make for excellent friends, reliable coworkers, and are often beloved by their in-laws.
10 percent of Americans read 10 to 19 books in 2024.
These are our overachievers—admirable people who understand the value of accumulating knowledge, honing their ability to focus and attend, and having interesting things to say. These people are likely high earners engaged in many charitable endeavors who make outstanding marriage material.
7 percent reading 20 to 49 books in 2024.
I fit into this category.
I read 28 books in 2024.
My fellow readers and I obviously love reading and seek to expand our understanding of our world at all times. We are the people who know that the more we know, the more likely we are to succeed.
We are almost always the best people to invite to a party.
The most likely to rescue a puppy that’s fallen through the ice.
If your pilot and copilot both suffer from simultaneous bouts of narcolepsy, we can probably land the plane.
We are always good-looking, hilarious, and insightful.
We smell great.
We also don’t make excuses about not having enough time to read because we understand that time is simply a matter of prioritization.
For example, the average American spends 2 hours and 15 minutes on social media every day.
I spend about 5-10 minutes per day at most, which gives me more time to do many things, including reading.
You have enough time to read. You simply allocate your time to other terrible, meaningless, mind-numbing endeavors.
As Freddy Mercury once said:
“We are the champions, my friendsAnd we’ll keep on fighting till the endWe are the championsWe are the championsNo time for losers‘Cause we are the champions of the world.”
4 percent read 50 or more books in 2024.
I’m not quite sure what to think of these people. They are essentially reading a book per week. As someone who admittedly reads exceedingly quickly, I can’t even imagine doing this. As an English major in college, I was reading 2-3 books per week at times, but that was required reading, so it often sucked a bit of the joy from the process.
These are clearly dedicated readers, but I worry:
Are they leaving their homes?
Exercising?
Bathing?
Eating?
I hope so. But I worry that they might not be noticing the change of seasons.
Here’s some good news:
The percentage of Americans who read at least one book increased from 54 percent in 2023 to 63 percent in 2024.
I’ll admit that 63 percent is still a pathetic number, but it’s better than last year, so I’ll celebrate progress in hopes it continues.
