My toddler is a crack addict. Even worse, your Amber Alert system is still operating in 1997.
My wife and I took our daughter to a local grocery store on Saturday morning to register her for the Amber Alert program. In order to register a child for…
I chose not to become a professional cuddler
My list of careers is long. Elementary school teacher Author Wedding DJ Minister Professional speaker Life coach My list of careers that I am seeking to make happen include: Professional…
I’m in complete agreement with Johnny Rotten
"The only thing you have in life is life. I don’t care if both legs fall off and there’s only one eyeball left. I want life!" – John Lydon (Johnny…
The perfect apron for those who support vegetables by not eating them.
I’ve written my hope that one day we discover that plants are actually sentient beings capable of thought and feelings. I’ve cited research that indicates that plants can see and…
One percent of stupidity
As of today, this video has been viewed more than three million times. It’s been liked by more than 41,000 viewers. It contains not an ounce of political rhetoric. Not…
I’m honest about my stupidity simply because I’m stupid more often than most.
I spent a weekend in Santa Cruz recently while on book tour. I was taking part in a literary retreat in which I had the opportunity to speak both formally…
Girl on horse
I grew up on the back of a horse. Until my parents divorced when I was about nine years old, our home and our lives were centered around the many…
Save the date
The Clowns, the rock opera written by Andy Mayo and myself, continues its march to Broadway with a weekend production at the Playhouse on Park in West Hartford, CT on…
Bloomingdale’s sucks. Whole Foods does not.
On Tuesday my wife was in Bloomingdales in Manhattan, attempting to make a purchase, when our debit card was declined. It turns out that the bank put a hold on…
My fictional relationships with women
I’ve had three serious but fictional relationships with women in my life. Each one was more serious than the last. My first began in elementary school with Annette Funicello. Annette…
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