At the beginning of every year I establish a list of goals (or New Year’s resolutions) for the coming calendar year. I post this list on my blog and social media as a means of holding myself accountable.
I recommend this to everyone. I’ve been engaged in this process since 2010, and I am convinced that I have been more productive and more successful as a result, even though my average goal completion rate stands at about 53%.
I’ve learned that setting exceptionally high goals and accepting inevitable failure are critical to achievement.
I’ve also honestly changed my life as a result of this process. Previous goals have led me to me meditating daily, learning to cook, flossing without missing a day in more than a decade, and exercising regularly. Many of the things that once appeared on my list of goals are now simply things that I do on a regular basis without thought or effort.
An unexpected side benefit has been the occasional assistance from readers in completing some of my goals, through advice, recommendations, and sometimes even direct intervention. Three years ago the amazing Kathryn Gonnerman turned the blog that I had written to my children for the first six years of their existence into six enormous, beautiful tomes that my kids are reading constantly.
She knocked one of my goals right off my list.
People are exceptionally kind, and I never turn down an offer of assistance.
Equally unexpected is the interest in these blog posts on my yearly goals and monthly updates. I often feel like updating my progress each month is the least interesting thing I write, but apparently there are readers out there who disagree. They are some of my most-read posts.
Below is my list of 51 goals for 2022. Two fewer than last year.
I always reserve the right to add to or edit a goal on the list when conditions change throughout the year, though this has almost never happened.
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PERSONAL FITNESS
1. Don’t die.
Recommended by my friend, Charles years ago. Still valid today, especially in today’s pandemic world, and deserving of the first spot on the list.
2. Lose 20 pounds.
Since 2010, I’ve lost a total of 53 pounds, but I’ve never met my yearly goal. Last year I was on track to lose my goal of 20 pounds before my surgery upended everything. I finished the year down just 10 pounds.
Another 20 is ambitious, but I’m willing to try to make that happen.
3. Do at least 100 push-ups, 100 sit-ups, and 3 one-minute planks for five days a week.
I’ve accomplished this goal for eight years in a row, only missing time due to injury, Disney, and surgical recovery, but it’s not exactly automatic (because it’s still hard and oftentimes a pain in the ass), so it remains on the list.
I won’t be able to resume this goal until March 1 at the earliest thanks to my surgery, which will make it much harder once I resume.
4. Cycle for at least 5 days every week.
I fell back in love with my bike at the onset of the pandemic when going to the gym became impossible then inadvisable. I rode every day for months. In November of 2020, we purchased a Nordictrack stationary cycle, and until my surgery knocked me off it for three months, I road that every day that the weather prevented me from riding outdoors.
I plan to ride on my bike or the Nordictrack for at least five days of every week.
5. Establish my golfing handicap, then lower that handicap by at least 2.
Rather than attempting to set a personal best (which has been my goal in the past), I’ll be looking to establish a handicap for myself then lower it by at least two strokes. This will allow me to chart yearly progress rather than waiting for that one blessed day in the sun when it all comes together for me.
Honestly, this is a bit of a shot in the dark in terms of a goal, since I have no idea what my initial handicap will be.
WRITING CAREER
6. Complete my seventh novel.
This is a failed goal from 2021 that I am renewing in 2022. It’s coming along, but not as quickly as I’d hoped.
7. Prepare “Storyworthy 2” or update “Storyworthy” or both for potential sale.
This book is already in very rough draft form. It may actually be two books, or better yet, one book and an update on my original storytelling book. I’ll need to revise, organize, re-write, and reshuffle this pile of words until it better resembles a book.
8. Write/complete at least three new picture books, including one with a female, non-white protagonist, and one protagonist who is not neurotypical.
I wrote three picture books in 2015.
I wrote another three in 2016.
I started but did not finish four picture books in 2017.
Those four books, plus two more, remained unfinished in 2018.
All six books remained unfinished in 2019, 2020, and 2021.
Worst of all, I haven’t sold any of them.
My goal for 2022 is to finish the year with three newly completed picture books. This can include books that I already began but didn’t finish and/or brand new ones.
At least one must feature a non-white, non-male protagonist and one must feature a character who is not neurotypical.
9. Complete a memoir.
Rather than writing a proposal for a memoir, my agent and I decided that it would be best if I simply wrote the book, so that process has begun. I plan to complete enough of the memoir to sell by the end of 2022.
Truthfully, I have two memoirs going at the moment:
One about the two year period when I was arrested, jailed, and tried for a crime I did not commit, which also led to homelessness then a pantry off a kitchen that I shared with a goat. I was also the victim of a horrific robbery at that time that left me with a lifetime of PTSD amongst other awfulness.
Also participation in an underground arm wrestling and gambling ring.
An interesting two years, to say the least.
The second is about the two year period in which a lowly band of anonymous cowards attempted to destroy my teaching career.
I’ve written about 25,000 words for both, so I really need to choose one and move forward.
10. Write a new screenplay.
I failed to write a screenplay for the last four years after writing my first in 2015. I started a new one in 2019 but it’s not close to completion. I intend to finish it in 2022 or simply write a new one. I have a writing partner taking a first pass at The Other Mother as a screenplay, then I will parachute in and see what I can do.
11. Write a solo show.
I’m in the process of writing a solo show based upon my arrest and trial for a crime I did not commit. I have assembled a team of brilliant people to workshop it, and I’m making solid progress. I want it done and ready to go by the end of the year if not sooner.
12. Write a musical.
My friend, Kaia, and I are writing a musical that we will also perform. She writes the music and lyrics. She and I write the story. I want it to be done and ready to go by the end of 2022.
13. Submit at least five Op-Ed pieces to The New York Times for consideration.
A completed goal from the last four years. I’m repeating it in 2022.
My dream goal remains to land another column in a magazine, newspaper, or online publication this year, but I’m keeping this goal more reasonable. Write and submit and then hope for the best.
14. Write at least four letters to my father.
I failed to complete this goal in 2021, mostly because the failure to receive letters in return made it hard to send more.
I’ll be repeating it again this year.
My father and I have been writing sporadic letters to each other since 2013. Since we speak little, it’s been a great way to get to know a man who disappeared from much of my life at the age of eight. I intend to write to him with the continued hope that he will write to me on my off months.
15. Write 100 letters in 2022.
I wrote 61 letters in 2018, 28 letters in 2019, 53 letters in 2020, and finally 114 letters in 2021. So I’m setting 100 as the goal again. The plan is to write a letter (paper, envelope, and stamp) every three days or so, to students, colleagues, friends, family, and anyone else who is deserving of praise, gratitude, recognition, scathing retribution, or the like.
It’s a way of making a day a little brighter for another person that appeals to me a lot. The results in some cases have been extraordinary. Remarkable responses and incredible connections.
I can’t recommend this enough.
16. Convert 365 Days of Elysha into a book.
Back in 2019, friend and storyteller Kathryn Gonnerman transformed my blog, Greetings Little One, into six beautiful tomes that the kids adore.
I plan to do the same to “365 Days of Elysha.”
Back in 2015, I wrote down one lovely observation about Elysha every day for a year, and I presented her with this Word document on our anniversary.
A Word document is nice, but it wasn’t exactly romantic.
I’d like to have this project turned into a book as well. Though I suspect that converting a Word document into a book will be decidedly easier, I failed to complete this goal in 2021, so I am keeping it on the list for 2022. I’ve also turned this project over to my production manager.
17. Read at least 12 books.
I’ve noticed over the past year that podcasts have been crowding out books when it comes to my content consumption, but Stephen King rightfully said, “If you don’t have time to read, you don’t have the time (or the tools) to write. Simple as that.”
Americans read an average of of 12 books per year, but the median number of books read per year is just 4, meaning that the blessed folks reading 100 books per year are artificially boosting the average.
I’ll shoot for 12. One per month.
18. Write to at least six authors about a book that I especially like.
On New Year’s Eve, I received an email from a woman who read my first novel in middle school and has been following my work ever since. She credited me for helping her fall in love with reading and has just finished writing her first novel. It was a joyous way to end the year.
I should do the same for authors whose books I adore. My goals is to do this at least six times in 2022.
STORYTELLING/SPEAKING CAREER
19. Complete the recordings for my new business for at least two target consumers.
I’m currently recording a storytelling series for business folks. Once that is done and my partners work their magic, it will be time to begin recording a second series for a different target audience. Attorneys, parents, performers, the clergy. Whatever we think is our next largest potential market.
My goal in 2022 is to complete the recording of at least two of these series.
20. Engage with LinkedIn at least once per week.
I use Twitter as a news source and the place where I occasionally express angry thoughts about stupid people.
I channel all of my blog content through Facebook.
I post photos on Instagram because my publicist tells me that I should and it’s easy.
I ignore TikTok.
I have basically ignored LinkedIn, too, but I am continually alerted to the fact that folks are mentioning me on the platform or asking to connect. Business people read my book and recommend it to others. A client with whom I’m consulting references me or one of my ideas. Someone attends a workshop and says nice things about it. I smile and move on, when in reality, these are the people with whom I do most of my business. A little bit of effort, I suspect, many go a long way.
I’ll find one thing to say per week and see what happens.
21. Produce a total of 6 Speak Up storytelling events.
Since we launched Speak Up back in 2013, we have produced a total of 107 shows.
2013: 3
2014: 8
2015: 12
2016: 17
2017: 17
2018: 13
2019: 17
2020: 12
2021: 8
We will likely produce more than 6 shows in 2022, but 6 seems like a reasonable number considering the impact on live events due to the pandemic.
22. Pitch myself to at least 3 upcoming TEDx events with the hopes of being accepted by one.
I’ve had some bad luck in terms of TED Talks.
I did a TED Talk at the AT&T Conference Center in 2013 that went extremely well, but technical difficulties made the audio on the recording almost indiscernible.
I did a TED Talk at Western Connecticut State University in 2013 that went flawlessly, but the college students who hosted the conference never posted the recording online.
I did a TED Talk in April of 2014 in Somerville, Massachusetts that also went well, but my 15 minute talk was accidentally put on a nine minute timer, which forced me to dump sections of my talk on the fly and speak faster than I would’ve liked. The talk was good, but it was not exactly what I had planned. There was a lot of room for improvement.
I did a TED Talk at Boston University in April of 2015. The recording started almost two minutes into my talk, and one of the cameras failed. The actual talk went very well but the recording is useless. Again, I’d like to repeat this talk at some point for TED.
But I’ve had some good luck as well.
I did a TED Talk in November of 2015 in the Berkshires that went very well and has been viewed more than 60,000 times. Huzzah!
I did a TED Talk in January of 2016 in Natick, MA that also went very well and has been viewed more than 25,000 times. Huzzah!
I did a TED Talk in April of 2016 at The Country School in Madison, CT, repeating that first TED Talk that didn’t get recorded well in 2013. I had to hold a microphone, which complicated things a bit, and there was no timer, so I had to rush in fear of going long. It’s been viewed about 30,000 times, but I’m still not entirely satisfied with the talk. I’d like to repeat it again under optimal circumstances.
I did a TED Talk in May of 2017 at the Pomfret School. Again, I had a handheld mic and no timer, and the recording was amateurish at best. Still, I thought it went well, but it’s only been viewed about 700 times.
I did a TED Talk in 2021 in the Berkshires that went very well and has been viewed 1,500 times.
I’ll also be speaking at TEDxCornell in April.
I plan on pitching new talks to at least three conferences in 2022.
23. Attend at least 6 Moth events with the intention of telling a story.
My Moth attendance ever since attending my first Moth StorySLAM in 2011 has been:
2011: 4
2012: 9
2013: 19
2014: 19
2015: 31
2016: 31
2017: 20
2018: 15
2019: 22
2020: 15
2021: 12
Note that this represents the number of times I attended a Moth event, including StorySLAMs, GrandSLAMs, Main Stage performances, The Moth Ball, and more. It does not represent the number of times I’ve actually performed.
Sadly, my name does not always get drawn from the hat.
As opportunities to speak and perform at other venues for a variety of organizations have increased, the time I’ve had to dedicate to Moth events has decreased, even though they remain my favorite shows in the world.
Give me a Moth StorySLAM any day.
Attending 6 Moth events in 2022 is a low number, but given the uncertainty ahead in terms of the pandemic, I can’t be sure how many Moth StorySLAMs will even be available to me in 2022, so even 6 might be an unrealistic number.
24. Win at least one Moth StorySLAM.
For the past five years, I have made three wins the goal. That has always felt ambitious, but since 2011, I’ve won 53% of the Moth StorySLAMs that I’ve competed in, and that percentage has remained fairly steady over the years.
Last year I set the goal of winning one StorySLAM, but I managed to win three out of five.
But given the uncertainty of 2022 in terms of public events and Moth StorySLAMs, three still seems too ambitious, so I’ll shoot for one victory and consider any other wins icing on the cake.
This goal depends upon the decisions of others (which I try to avoid when setting goals), but competing in StorySLAMs just isn’t enough to justify the goal.
I need to win.
25. Win a Moth GrandSLAM.
I won one GrandSLAM in 2014.
I won two GrandSLAMs in 2015.
I won one GrandSLAM in 2016.
I failed to win a GrandSLAM in 2017.
I won two GrandSLAMs in 2018.
I failed to win a GrandSLAM in 2019.
I failed to win a GrandSLAM in 2020.
I won one GrandSLAM in 2021.
Overall, I’ve won 7 GrandSLAMs in 29 attempts for a 24% win rate.
Much harder to win a GrandSLAM with all of those annoyingly excellent storytellers, not to mention the three times I was defeated by stories that I helped find and craft.
Arming my competition. A terrible strategy.
This goal also depends upon the decisions of others (including how quickly my turn in a GrandSLAM comes up) but competing in a Moth GrandSLAM just isn’t enough to justify the goal.
Once again, I need to win.
26. Produce at least 12 episodes of our podcast Speak Up Storytelling.
Since launching our podcast in 2018, Elysha and I have produced the following number of episodes:
2018: 30 episodes
2019: 44 episodes
2020: 30 episodes
2021: 14 episodes
A number of factors curtailed our production schedule in 2021. The goal of 12 episodes for 2022 is admittedly conservative. Our goal is to produce one per month, plus one solo episodes per month. With my Production Manager, Kaia, now editing the podcast, things should be easier on my end, so this feels much more doable.
Consistency over quantity is what we are shooting for in 2022.
27. Convert my YouTube channel into an actual channel.
Currently my YouTube channel is a repository of my stories and storytelling lessons. It needs to be structured and ordered better, and the content sitting on my computer needs to be uploaded thoughtfully. My production manager and I will tackle this in 2022.
28. Perform stand-up at least 3 times in 2022.
I performed stand-up six times in 2018 and four times in 2019. Thanks to the pandemic, I did not get onstage in 2020 or 2021 for stand-up. I don’t know when a stand-up stage will be available to me again, but I’d like to shoot for three times in 2022 if and when I feel it safe to return to the stage.
29. Pitch a story to This American Life.
I had a story on This American Life in May of 2014. Since then, I’ve occasionally pitched stories to someone I know who works for the show. In 2022 I want to make a more concerted effort to pitch one story to this show that I adore.
30. Pitch myself to Marc Maron’s WTF podcast at least three times.
When I list possible publicity opportunities for my publicist, Marc Maron’s WTF was top of the list. I’ve been listening since his first episode, and I would love to have a conversation with him. I’ve pitched myself to him before, including three last year, and I’ll do it again, at least three times, in 2022.
31. Send a newsletter to readers at least 25 times (every other week).
My new company will likely make this easy, as newsletters will become part of the marketing for the product, but I’ll continue to send out my bi-weekly newsletter offering insights into storytelling and a peak into my life.
HOME
32. Clear the basement.
Last year I successfully cleaned and cleared the basement. In 2022 I will continue to eliminate items that we no longer need, making even more space available for nothing.
33. Organize the children’s books.
My kids have reached the age that the picture books that so dominated a decade of our kids’ lives have been pushed aside in favor of stacks upon stacks of fantasy novels, graphic novels, and illustrated guides to astrophysics.
My job will be to sort these forgotten books into three piles:
- Books we can give away
- Books we want to keep out for evenings of nostalgia
- Books we want to pack away for when there are grandchildren
It will take some manual labor and an enormous amount of emotional fortitude.
FAMILY/FRIENDS
34. Text or call brother or sister once per month.
My brother and sister and I don’t talk enough. I’m going to speak to either one at least once per week via text or phone call.
35. Take at least one photo of my children every day.
As I scanned through my photos on a plane ride to Indiana in 2019, I noticed a decline in photos taken of the kids over the years. This is only natural. When a child is born, photos are taken every nine seconds, but as time passes, this burst of photography subsides a bit.
One photo per day, every day when I see the kids, in 2022 is the goal.
36. Take at least one photo with Elysha and myself each week.
Even worse than the decline in photos of the kids are the rarity of photos of just Elysha and me. We need to rectify this as well, so at least once per week, I will take a photograph of just the two of us.
37. Plan a reunion of the Heavy Metal Playhouse.
My friend, Bengi, and I lived in a home that became known as the Heavy Metal Playhouse from 1989-1993. It was four of the best years of my life. Enormous parties, the closest of friendships, and the wildness of youth left an indelible mark on me. While I stay in touch with many of my friends from those days, I have not seen many of them in a long time. We have attempted to plan a reunion in the past without success.
Starting in 2016, I’ve tried to make a reunion happen but failed. 2021 convinced me that a virtual reunion via Zoom might be the best option given some of our friends are spread out around the country.
I’m going to make this happen in 2022.
38. I will not comment, positively or negatively, about physical appearance of any person save my wife and children, in 2017 in an effort to reduce the focus on physical appearance in our culture overall.
In 2016, I decided to avoid all negative comments related to a person’s physical appearance.
In 2017 I decided to add positive comments as well (save my wife, children, and in-laws) in an effort to reduce the focus on physical appearance in our culture overall.
I’ve achieved this goal for the past four years, and by writing about it, I’ve convinced at least two dozen other people to adopt the policy as well.
For this reason, I will repeat this goal in 2022, even though it’s now simply become something I do.
39. Compliment one person every day on a topic unrelated to physical appearance.
In an effort to make the world a better place, I will deliberately find a reason to compliment one person every day for something unrelated to physical appearance and entirely within their control.
I will not count students in this goal since I spend all day offering them positive reinforcement, often in the form of compliments on effort and kindness.
40. Surprise Elysha at least six times in 2021.
A completed goal from the last four years that I will repeat in 2022.
41. Play poker at least six times in 2021.
I love poker. I paid for our honeymoon with profits from poker. I made a mortgage payment in 2012 with poker profits when it was still legal online. I am a very good poker player who stopped playing regularly in 2015 as I shifted my time to writing and storytelling.
But over the past few years, I’ve been making a more concerted effort to play, including last year when we shifted to a virtual game because of the pandemic.
Six games in 2022 is a reasonable goal.
42. Spend at least six days with my best friend of more than 30 years.
Bengi and I met in a Milford, MA McDonald’s back in 1987, and we have been friends ever since. We once lived together (in the aforementioned Heavy Metal Playhouse) and started our DJ business together back in 1996. We have been through a great deal together, but in the last few years, we have seen less of each other even though we live 15 minutes apart. Our interests have shifted away from the things each likes to do, and our families are demanding more of our time, but that’s no excuse for not getting together more often.
Six days is more than reasonable.
NEW PROJECTS
43. Create an emergency preparedness kit for each car.
In 2021 I built emergency preparedness packs in the event we needed to leave our home quickly. This year I’ll built something similar for each car in the event we are stuck somewhere or find ourselves in an emergency.
44. Memorize the lyrics to at least 5 favorite songs.
You know those songs that you’ve listened to all your life but never found the time to actually learn the lyrics? I’m going to rectify this in 2022 by learning the lyrics to a few of my favorites in this category, including including “Come on Eileen” by Dexy’s Midnight Runners, “Fat Bottomed Girls” by Queen, and “Mr. Blue Sky” by ELO.
45. Learn to play the piano by practicing at least three times a week.
I’m not hoping to become a great or even capable pianist, but learning something new is important, and we have a keyboard, so why not? I will take classes via Master Class and practice at least 3 times a week for at least 20 minutes at a time.
46. Convert our wedding video to a transferable format.
Our wedding video only exists on the ancient Mac that I originally made it on, but I have yet to be able to remove the file from the laptop. It plays on the laptop, but I can’t move it onto another machine or to the cloud. I plan to find a way to make this happen in 2021.
47. Memorize 5 new poems.
Back in college, I was required to memorize and recite one poem every week for a poetry class, and many of those poems are still locked in my brain today.
I also have several French poems still memorized from French class in high school.
I like having these poems memorized. It’s fun to be able to recite them whenever I please. About ten years ago, on a rainy day at Camp Jewell, we conducted Theater Olympics for our 100 or so fifth graders. One of the events was “Unknown Talent Show” where the teachers had to perform a talent that no one knew they possessed.
I recited French poetry to my principal, who stood on a chair with a mop over his head.
Memorization is also an excellent way to preserve longterm brain health.
My goal this year is to memorize five new poems.
48. Write to at least 3 colleges about why they should hire me.
I should be teaching teachers in college. Specifically, I would like to teach four classes:
- Engaging and motivating students through fun
- Effective classroom management
- Establishing and maintaining positive relationships with parents
- Teaching writing in the way that actual writers write
As far as I can tell, none of these classes exist in a teacher’s preparatory program today, despite the fact that discipline, motivation, and a strong parent-teacher partnership are three of the most important things a teacher can do to guarantee a successful learning environment. Philosophy, pedagogy, and curriculum are truly irrelevant without them.
In 2021, I am going to write to the administrators of local colleges with teacher prep programs offering my services. More hubris, I know. But I would also be damn good at this, and it’s not happening enough in colleges these days.
49. Understand Instagram better.
I can post photos to Instagram, but that is the extent of my understanding of Instagram.
Instagram stories? I have no idea what they are nor what I might do with them.
Video on Instagram? Is that a thing I should think of doing?
Followers? I have about 1,500 followers but have made absolutely no effort to attract any, nor do I know how to attract them.
Even the messages and mentions on Instagram confuse me.
As this platform begins to dominate social media, I need to understand it better. Use it more effectively. I failed to complete this goal in 2020, so I plan on devoting time to this in 2021.
50. Complete my Eagle Scout project.
Back in 1988, I was 17 year-old-Boy Scout preparing to complete my Eagle Scout service project so I could earn the rank that I had dreamed about for most of my childhood. In truth, I was qualified to earn my Eagle rank almost two years before, having earned the required merit badges and more, but my service project had been sitting on the back burner, waiting to be completed.
I needed a parent or two to light a fire under my butt and support me in this endeavor, but I wasn’t graced with that level of parental involvement at the time.
My plan was to plant trees in a cemetery in my hometown of Blackstone, MA. My troop had planted trees in that same cemetery about five years before, but those trees had died. I wanted to replace them and complete the work that we had originally promised.
Then, on December 23, 1988, I was in a car accident that nearly killed me. As a result of the accident, I was in a full-length leg cast for three months and required an enormous amount of healing and recovery. With just three months left until I turned 18 (the deadline to complete an Eagle service project), my parents requested an extension, and it was denied.
My childhood dream of becoming an Eagle Scout was over. It’s one of my life’s greatest regrets.
Maybe the greatest.
But I recently decided that it would be good to complete that Eagle Scout project even though it won’t come with my much desire Eagle Scout rank.
It feels right. Maybe I’ll feel a little better about the past.
I planned on doing this in 2020 but the pandemic put a hold on those intentions. It will be a goal again in 2021.
51. Post my progress in terms of these resolutions on this blog and social media on the first day of every month.
