Archive for June 2024

I love minor-league baseball. The combination of genuine athletic excellence, relentless amusement, unabashed silliness, and low-stakes competition make for the perfect way to spend an afternoon at the ballpark. On Father’s Day, my family spent the day at Dunkin Donuts Field, home of the Hartford Yard Goats. The home team was engaged in a pitching…

A few months ago, I performed in “Matt and Jeni Are Unprepared,” a storytelling improv show in which audience members provide my storytelling partner, Jeni Bonaldo, and me with prompts, from which we tell true stories on the spot. The audience then determines whose stories are better. It’s competitive storytelling on a highwire, and I…

There are three kinds of people in the world: Those who would never, ever share their toothbrush with another person. Those who might grudgingly share their toothbrush with their spouse or child or someone similarly intimate if necessary. Those who would share their toothbrush with almost any other person I’m in category 3, but I…

Bill Maher is a comedian I like very much because he says things I love and hate. Sometimes, I agree with him entirely. Other times, I think he’s wrongheaded and dumb. But I like that. I enjoy being challenged. I think opposition to my ideas is healthy and productive. Unlike so many people who seem…

Years ago, someone asked my wife, Elysha, when she first started falling in love with me. Thankfully, I was standing beside her when this question was asked. My assumption, of course, was that she took one look at me, swooned, and fell head over heels in love. This, it turns out, was not the case. …

Not only were there nine unmatched socks in Charlie’s laundry basket, but there were also no matched pairs. Just nine random socks. How is this even possible?

My Father’s Day was all I could have ever wanted. Also slightly disappointing. My best version of Father’s Day would be one filled with nonstop fun, and that was certainly the case for me. It started at sunrise with nine holes of golf with my friends. I didn’t play great, but I didn’t play poorly…

I’ve been very fortunate as a serious sports fan. In my lifetime, I’ve been lucky enough to watch: Six New England Patriots Super Bowl championships Seven New York Yankees World Series championships One Boston Bruins Stanley Cup championship And up until last night, four Boston Celtics NBA championships The Yankees and Celtics won other championships…

Today is the first of my summer vacation. The school year ended last Thursday, but after dismissing my students at the end of the day, I drove for two hours straight to Logan Airport, where I took off for Arizona, where I was speaking on Friday morning. Then, I returned to the airport and flew…

Of CNN’s “60 practical Father’s Day gifts that your dad will actually use,” I would use exactly four, and I already own three: Battery organizer storage case Electronic cable organizer Martini golf tees The one I would actually use and don’t own: Zero gravity lounge chair The other 56 items—tools, cooking implements, camping gear, personal…