Years ago, I created a Friendship Application — a means of identifying the quality of a potential friend.
Looking at it now, it seems unnecessary and even counterproductive. I would never limit the number of friends I can have, and unless you’re insufferable or monstrous, I’d happily count you as one of my many friends.
A researcher recently identified me as a “super-connector”— someone with many friends and acquaintances who tends to bring people together and is intensely and deeply connected to many people.
Upon reflection — and after a two-hour interview on the subject, during which she highlighted things that had never occurred to me — I think she’s probably right. There are many reasons for this that I’ll be writing about in the future—here and, if they become numerous enough — in a book.
So I began to wonder who I might befriend if I had no limits.
In short, what dead, famous, or otherwise unreachable person would I want as a friend?
So, I’ve begun my list. My criteria is this:
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The person must be a slam dunk. In the past several weeks, I have considered dozens of maybes and probables, but unless I can say for certain that I would call that person my friend, he or she is not added to the list.
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I cannot add people to the list for curiosity’s sake. For example, I would love to hear the truth about the Kennedy assassination from Lee Harvey Oswald, but that desire for information is not enough to befriend him.
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I’m seeking people who impress me so thoroughly that I want to spend as much time as possible in their company.
- I’m deliberately avoiding people who strike me as extraordinary but would likely dominate every conversation in less-than-deal ways.
Of course, my assessment of each person is based solely upon their public persona and what I can glean from their writing, speeches, and public work. Some may seem fantastic on the outside but could be awful and monstrous in private, so this list is admittedly based on a great deal of assumption.
Here’s what I’ve got so far, listed alphabetically.
- Anne Frank
- Aparna Nancherla
- Audre Lorde
- Bill Burr
- Bruce Springsteen
- Douglas Adams
- Dulce Sloan
- Eleanor Roosevelt
- Frederick Douglass
- George Carlin
- Greta Gerwig
- Harriet Tubman
- Henry David Thoreau
- HL Mencken
- Jonathan Swift
- Lenny Bruce
- Margaret Cho
- Maria Bamford
- Mark Twain
- Oscar Wilde
- Rachel Bloom
- Simon de Beauvoir
- Sophie Scholl
- Stephen King
- Taylor Swift
- Thomas Paine
- Voltaire
If you have any suggestions for additions, please send them along.
If you would like to generate your own list and share it with me, that would be even better.
