A friend in need is a friend indeed.
I have always been under the impression that this proverb has a derogatory connotation. I thought it meant that when someone is in trouble and in need, they are prone to becoming a better friend in order to extract the assistance that they require.
But then I was watching Sesame Street with my children, when I heard the proverb used in a positive way.
I was confused, so I decided to see if I have been wrong about this proverb for all of my life.
I’ve made similar mistakes before.
It turns out that this issue is up for debate.
The best explanation I found is here. It begins:
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This is one of the phrases in the language that is interesting because there are various interpretations of the meaning. Firstly, is it:
A friend in need is a friend indeed.
or…
A friend in need is a friend in deed.
Clearly, that would have a bearing on the meaning.
The “in need” is also open to interpretation.
Is it a friend (when you are) in need or a friend (who is) in need?
If the former, then the phrase means: ‘someone who helps you when you are in need is a true friend.
If the latter, it is ‘someone who needs your help becomes especially friendly in order to obtain it.
So, that gives us four options
- A friend, (when you are) in need, is indeed a true friend.
- A friend, (when you are) in need, is someone who is prepared to act to show it.
- A friend, (who is) in need is indeed a true friend.
- A friend, (who is) in need, is someone who is prepared to act to show it.
Feel free to read about the origin of the phrase and the scholarship used to determine its true meaning, but suffice it to say that meaning #2, denoting a positive connotation regarding friendship, seems to be the original intent of the proverb and is the most common usage of the proverb today.
While this is still subject to much debate, it would appear that I was probably wrong.
For all of my life.
Again.
