A not-so-disappointing disappointing night at The Moth
It's always disappointing to drive almost three hours to a Moth StorySLAM and have your name remain in the hat for the duration of the night. I went to The Moth…
My wife doesn’t jump into the shower with me on a regular basis, but this thing about her parents is a close second.
I'd like for my wife to love the way I look. I would love for her to think of me as the best looking guy in every room every time. I'd…
Why I think professional wrestling is stupid
My friends who watch professional wrestling have long argued that watching a fake sporting event is no different than watching a fictional television show like Breaking Bad or Mad Men. And…
The two best super powers of all time (one of them is not teleportation)
My wife, Deadspin, and many others argue that teleportation is the greatest of all the super powers. Teleportation would be an amazing super power to possess. I would love to be able to…
Clara on Picasso
Clara, my seven year-old daughter, on Picasso: ““Charlie, why don’t you draw something like Pablo Picasso? He was an artist who lived a long time ago. Even before Mommy and…
The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs: The paperback cover
The paperback edition of The Perfect Comeback of Caroline Jacobs doesn't come out until March of 2017, but the new cover is ready. Let me know what you think!
My son, the storyteller. I had no idea.
My three year-old son made up a story about traveling to New York to visit his cousins Ari and Zoe. If you listen closely, it actually many of the all…
Possibly the perfect outgoing voicemail message
Matthew Inman of The Oatmeal tweeted this last week: ““Hey, this is Matt’s voicemail. Leave a message and I’ll get back to you years from now when you learn to…
#Biblebuffet
Protip: If you're using The Bible to justify your opposition to gay marriage, don't forget to treat all adulterers EXACTLY the same way. God makes it abundantly clear that both…
internet at last
On November 23, 2009, I wrote a post arguing that it's stupid that the word "Internet" needs to be capitalized. Seven years later, The Associated Press—purveyor of the AP Stylebook, used by journalists…
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