Archive for December 2014
Storyteller Interruptus
I don’t have an office. I have a sad, little room attached to the side of the house with ancient windows and no heat that would require a hat and mittens in order to spend any time in. So when I am working at home, I do the majority of my writing at the dining…
Read MoreTurns out that I’m quite the catch
There are 6.8 billion people on the planet. Only 3.5 billion use a toothbrush. My wife may think that I can’t wash the dishes (as she told a sold out audience at a recent Speak Up event), and I may occasionally throw away things that she considers valuable (last week it was an envelope of…
Read MoreAnother reason why I want a time machine
I don’t want to change history. Just watch it unfold. For moments like these:
Read MoreIf Newington, Connecticut ever wants a new slogan, it has many options, including a serial killer and a lot of coffee.
I live in the town of Newington, Connecticut. Our town’s slogan, at least according to our seal, is Growth & Progress. This is a fine slogan, I guess. The two words are similar, so it’s kind of like putting a hat on a hat. But still, it’s fine. However, if the town is ever looking…
Read MoreWhy it’s glorious to be a Patriots fan
Since 1993, the New England Patriots have had two starting quarterbacks: Perennial Pro Bowler Drew Bledsoe and future Hall of Famer Tom Brady. There was a season when backup quarterback Matt Cassel was forced to play when Tom Brady was injured, but there was no question that Brady would be the starting quarterback once he…
Read More“I checked his tushy and there was no poop anywhere.”
I was sitting at my computer in the dining room, writing my next great American novel. My five year-old daughter, Clara, and my two year-old son, Charlie, were upstairs playing. My wife was shopping. From the top of the stairs came Clara’s little voice. Tentative at first and then more confident. Clara: “Dad, I could…
Read MoreSeasons Magazine: My latest column on how real men don’t use snow blowers
The winter edition of Seasons magazine is now available for your reading pleasure. If you don’t subscribe to Seasons, the magazine can also be read online, including my column, “The Last Word,” which can be found on the last page of the magazine. For the winter edition, I write about how real men don’t use…
Read MoreThe girl rejected her mother’s culinary advances, but the boy could not resist
My daughter shows little interest in cooking with her mother. Perhaps, like me, she doesn’t understand why anyone would want to spend time cooking meals when there are other people willing to do it for you. Even if you’re not married to an excellent chef like me, there are always restaurants, fast food, take out,…
Read MoreI guess I really, really, really love my wife.
I had a dream that I was living in some alternate reality. I wasn’t married to Elysha or anyone else. I was standing by a stove, looking at a serving dish, and I realized that I would never feel as good about that serving dish without Elysha in my life. That serving dish would always…
Read MoreEveryone is completely overwhelmed, except I kind of think that they aren’t and should reconsider their position.
It seems as if I hear someone say that they are overwhelmed or someone they know is overwhelmed or a certain segment of the population is overwhelmed almost every day. I don’t get it. The average American watches 34 hours of television a week. Spends almost two hours a day on social media. Spends 40…
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