Who the hell are you, Bart Simpson?

Charlie and I were watching The Simpsons.

Season 6. Episode 7.

“Bart’s Girlfriend”

Halfway through the episode, Charlie groaned.

“Watching Bart Simpson flirt is making me ill. I truly feel pain.”

I understood exactly what he meant.

Though young love is real and true, the last thing you want to see is Bart Simpson tied down in a committed relationship that might stymie his ability to flaunt the rules, ignore law and order, and create unmitigated mayhem.

Bart Simpson simply wasn’t built for monogamy.

“I feel your pain, buddy,” I said. “But just remember: In Springfield, USA, all problems are only 22 minutes long.”

If only we could all be so lucky.