Valentine’s Day

It’s Valentine’s Day!

I know that a great number of people despise Valentine’s Day.

They reject it as a fabricated, commercialized Hallmark holiday

They protest the inflated flower prices and their inability to get a reservation in any decent restaurant.

They are offended by the reminder that they are still single. Or newly single. Or endlessly single. Or occasionally single.

Then we have the people who say things like, “I don’t need the calendar to tell me to give my wife flowers,” and “Our love doesn’t wait for February 14th.”

They may snipe at happily married couples, blossoming romances, and surprisingly successful throuples.

Ask any of these folks what they have planned for Valentine’s Day, and they may stab you with their ballpoint pen.

Some of these complaints might have a tiny splash of validity, but here’s the real worst thing about Valentine’s Day:

All those people who complain about Valentine’s Day.

If you don’t like Valentine’s Day, just treat it like any other day. Ignore the roses and candy and hand-holding. Walk right past the boundless romance and starry-eyed attraction. Pretend it never happened because complaining about Valentine’s Day has three significant problems:

1. It attempts to ruin the joy of others for entirely personal reasons.

2. It makes you look like an unpalatable, sour-puss jerk face.

3. Worst of all, complaining about Valentine’s Day is wholly unoriginal. It’s been done so many times already. It’s probably being done by someone as you read these words. And I assure you, it’s been done far better than you will ever do it. We’ve all heard the Valentine’s Day complaints before. You’re not saying anything new.

Far worse than spending Valentine’s Day alone is spending it being unoriginal and boring.

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone.