At one of the many middle school concerts that Elysha and I attended last year, I (and presumably many others) noticed a female student and performer onstage wearing a black tee shirt with the words “Ironically hot” emblazoned across the front.
It was unexpected. Surprising, even.
Especially considering the rest of the performers wore the prescribed white or black shirts without any words or iconography.
I couldn’t help but think:
Those parents don’t know how to say no.
Judgmental, I know. Terrible of me. I’m a horrible human being.
I’m also admittedly making an enormous assumption.
In fairness, maybe the idea of purchasing an “Ironically hot” tee shirt for a seventh grader and wearing it to a middle school concert was her parents’ idea. Or maybe the decision came with her parents’ full endorsement.
Perhaps her mom wore the same shirt to her own middle school concert years ago, so donning it was a family tradition of sorts.
Or maybe her father thought it was amusing and subversive and, therefore, entirely appropriate for a middle school event.
Or perhaps it was just an accident. The student simply grabbed the first shirt on the pile and failed to notice the words printed across the chest.
Regardless of the rationale behind the decision, I’d like to take an objective stand against any middle school student broadcasting to the world via their shirt that they are “ironically hot” in a school concert setting and perhaps anywhere else.
Many years ago, a student arrived on the first day of school wearing a shirt with “Sexy 10” printed across the front.
I had the same feelings about that particular choice of clothing:
Those parents don’t know how to say no. And being able to say no and stick to it is a critical skill for parents. Teachers, too.
I have similar thoughts when I see a third grader with their own cell phone. Or when a student eats four packages of Oreos – four cookies to a package – for a snack every day. Or when a fifth-grade student sports a fake tattoo on his neck that reads “Guns & Girls.”
All things I have seen in my 25 years of teaching.
I suspect that none of those parents understood how to say no.
Or alternatively, maybe all of those parents thought that those decisions were righteous and just.
I’m not sure which is worse:
Thinking those things are okay or not being able to say no to your child.
Probably a tie.
Again, all of this is terribly judgmental on my part. I’m a horrible person.
