I couldn’t resist pointing out this idiot, who’s car I saw at the gym today. It’s parked about three feet from the curb and in the path of oncoming traffic.
In fact, notice the passenger-side mirror, which is smashed and hanging to the car by a thread.
Apparently this isn’t the first time this moron chose to leave his or her car in harm’s way.
It’s also important to know that there are at least half a dozen open parking spots directly behind me, about twenty feet from this newly-created parking spot. Why go to the gym, presumably work out, but park illegally in order to save yourself twenty or thirty steps?
Wyatt Salem, the protagonist of CHICKEN SHACK, would have been prepared to deal with this jackass. In order to respond to people who park in handicapped spots illegally, he keeps sun reflectors in his trunk at all times: the kind that a car owner might spread across his or her dashboard in order to keep the interior of the car from becoming too hot. Painted across each of these reflectors are the words:
I am not disabled. I am just a prick.
He places these on the windshield of the offender’s car, using the windshield wipers to hold them in place.
Shame is Wyatt’s weapon of choice.
I see cars parked like this at the gym so often that I might take a page from Wyatt’s playbook and prepare similar reflectors with the message:
I’m special and/or stupid, so I can park wherever I want.
That would’ve made my day.
